Friday The 13th And Unitarian Universalists Making Their Own Luck - What's The Connection?
How about this "electronic communication" that I just sent to the Board of Trustees of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association aka UUMA, and some UUMA staff, who are making their own luck, and indeed pushing their luck. . . by FAILing, and possibly even refusing, to respond in responsibility to the previous "electronic communication" that I sent to them just over two weeks ago on American Thanksgiving Day 2019?
UUMA Board of Trustees
24 Farnsworth Street
Boston, MA
02210-1409 U.S.A.
Friday The 13th December 2019
Dear Members of the Board of Trustees of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association,
When I sent you my "electronic communication" about the serious flaws in the UUMA Board's ostensible apology for clergy sexual misconduct just over two weeks ago on Thanksgiving Day 2019, I expected to receive a timely response to it from the UUMA based upon the fact that the UUMA website's form submission stated that the "electronic communication" that I submitted via the online form on the UUMA's website would be responded to in a timely manner. I did not expect a response until a week or more after submitting my "electronic communication" and sending you back-up emails of the same communication, because of the Thanksgiving holiday and ensuing weekend, but it has now been more than two weeks since I shared my concerns with you and I have not received any response to my sharing of my concerns other than the automated response from your website and a couple of automated "out of office" reply emails to the back-up emails that I sent you and some UUMA staff. If I do not receive a response from the UUMA Board by the end of next week I will reasonably assume that the UUMA Board is knowingly and willfully refusing to respond in responsibility to my sharing of my legitimate, and quite serious, concerns about your problematic "letter of apology" for the UUMA's decades worth of negligence towards clergy sexual misconduct, to say nothing of UUMA negligence towards non-sexual forms of clergy misconduct.
Please take steps to ensure that the UUMA Board responds in responsibility to both the letter and the spirit of my "electronic communications" of November 28th, 2019, as well as today's follow-up communication, by the end of next week at the latest. It would be quite regrettable if the UUMA Board chose to start off the next decade on the wrong foot with respect to the UUMA's past, and apparently ongoing. . . involvement in Unitarian Universalist clergy abuse cover-up and denial which includes, but is by no means limited to, what Dee Ann Miller calls DIM Thinking.
i.e. Denial, Ignorance, and Minimization
See: www.takecourage.org/defining.htm
I did say that I would expand upon the critique of your problematic ostensible "apology" for clergy sexual misconduct, so I am hereby providing you with my updated point-by-point critique of the UUMA Board's seriously flawed "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct":
:Dear UUMA Colleagues,
This introductory salutation makes it clear that the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association's self-described "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct" was sent to "UUMA colleagues". i.e. Unitarian Universalist ministers who are members of the UUMA. Surely an ostensible "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct" should first and foremost be addressed to, and delivered to, the actual victims and survivors of clergy sexual misconduct, followed by their friends and families, and then the UUA congregations that have been negatively affected by recent or "historic" clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUA clergy.
Why was the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association's "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct" sent only to members of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association, and apparently kept hidden from not only the general public, but from the vast majority of Unitarian Universalists?
Why is the "Letter of Apology" concealed behind a "firewall" on the UUMA website?
Were the UUMA members who this "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct" was sent to instructed, of otherwise expected, deliver this ostensible "apology letter" to the congregants of their respective Unitarian Universalist congregations during a Sunday service, or otherwise communicate it to their congregants?
:We, the Board of Trustees of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association, wish to offer an apology on behalf of the institution, for the harm we have done by failing to take appropriate action arising from sexual misconduct committed by our members.
Again, who is this institutional apology actually meant for? It seems that it was sent only to Unitarian Universalist ministers who are members of the UUMA. This is not even all Unitarian Universalost ministers, since some UUA ministers are not members of the UUMA. It also seems to apologize for sexual misconduct committed by UUMA members, not Unitarian Universalist ministers more generally. Did *any* victims-survivors of clergy sexual misconduct aka clergy sex abuse committed by UUMA members receive copies of this ostensible institutional "letter of apology" for clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUMA members?
:We regret our actions or inactions that have in any way ignored, minimized or not responded appropriately to their misconduct.
This statement of regret is more than a little bit ironic in that this UUMA "letter of apology" itself significantly minimizes the extent and seriousness of clergy sexual misconduct committed by Unitarian Universalist clergy (or at least UUMA members); indeed this "apology letter" even completely ignores some of the worst forms of clergy sexual misconduct (i.e. "such despicable crimes as pedophilia and rape") in that it makes no mention whatsoever of these despicable crimes which have in fact been committed by certain Unitarian Universalist ministers. . . It would be fair to say that this UUMA institutional "apology" does not respond appropriately to the past, indeed "historic", sexual misconduct of UUA ministers.
:While the great majority of our colleagues have conducted themselves with the utmost honesty and integrity, a few have not, and our institution did not always live up to its responsibility to take appropriate action.
Really?!
Only "a few" UUMA members have not "conducted themselves with the utmost honesty and integrity"?!
Coulda fooled me. . .
I know of dozens, if not hundreds, of Unitarian Universalist ministers who have most certainly not conducted themselves with "the utmost honesty and integrity", indeed this UUMA "letter of apology" does not model "the utmost honesty and integrity" in that it clearly minimizes the extent and seriousness of clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUMA members, and even completely ignores the worst forms of clergy sexual abuse, i.e. "such despicable crimes as pedophilia and rape" most certainly committed by "certain Unitarian Universalist ministers". As far as I am concerned, it is bordering on self-congratulatory narcissism for the UUMA Board of Trustees to assert that "the great majority of our colleagues have conducted themselves with the utmost honesty and integrity". I am not aware of one single Unitarian Universalist minister who has conducted themself with "the utmost honesty and integrity" throughout their career as a UUA minister.
Not one. . .
Getting back to that use of the word "few" to refer to those UUMA members who have not "conducted themselves with the utmost honesty and integrity". . . Those who are "in the know" about Unitarian Universalist clergy sexual misconduct matters know that literally hundreds of UUA congregations have been affected by clergy sexual misconduct of one kind or another. I am quite reliably informed that a group of interim ministers, who took it upon themselves to count the number of UUA congregations that have had clergy sexual misconduct complaints brought against one or more of their ministers, stopped counting when they reached 400. That is almost 40% of UUA congregations, and that incomplete calculation was done some years ago now. How could only "a few" members of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers Association, to say nothing of UUA clergy more generally, cause a minimum of 400 UUA congregations to be affected by clergy sexual misconduct?
And 400 UUA congregations is the *minimum* number of UU congregations affected by clergy sexual misconduct of one kind or another. Other people who are very well informed about Unitarian Universalism's clergy sexual misconduct problem have estimated that 600-700 of the UUA's 1000 or so congregations have been affected by clergy sexual misconduct. It is "beyond belief" that only "a few" UUMA members could commit clergy sexual misconduct in 400 or more UUA congregations.
UUA Moderator Jim Key told the very same lie in the "less than honest" institutional apology that he delivered on behalf of the UUA Board of Trustees during his first Moderator's Report to a General Assembly of the Unitarian Universalist Association in June of 2014. You may read my point-by-point critique of the UUA Board's seriously flawed and, in my opinion, completely worthless institutional apology for clergy sexual misconduct here:
http://emersonavenger.blogspot.com/2015/12/uua-moderator-jim-key-liar-liar-pants.html
Regarding the UUMA Board's rather questionable use of the phrase "the utmost honesty and integrity". . . Is it even remotely appropriate for the UUMA Board to assert that "a few" UUMA members have not "conducted themselves with the utmost honesty and integrity" when describing UUMA members who have committed clergy sexual misconduct, some of which includes what the UUA's Canadian attorney, Stikeman Elliott Barristers & Solicitors defamation lawyer Maitre Marc-André Coulombe, has described as "such despicable crimes as pedophilia and rape"?
The UUMA's assertion that "our institution did not always live up to its responsibility to take appropriate action" is yet another UUMA *minimization* of the negligent and complicit manner in which the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association, the Unitarian Universalist Association aka UUA, and the UUA's very aptly named Ministerial *Fellowship* Committee responded to complaints about clergy sexual misconduct, to say nothing of complaints about non-sexual misconduct committed by UUA clergy, for decades. Asserting that "our institution did not always live up to its responsibility to take appropriate action" suggests that there were only a few lapses here and there but that, on the whole, the UUMA generally did "live up to its responsibility to take appropriate action".
Nothing could be further from the truth.
:We offer this apology because we recognize that there has been a collective and systematic failure on the part of generations of UUMA leaders to take appropriate action arising from such misconduct.
Most ironically, this acknowledgement actually contradicts the UUMA Board's assertions in the previous paragraph to the effect that only "a few" UUMA members are guilty of committing clergy sexual misconduct of one kind or another, and the "less than honest" misleading insinuation that the UUMA generally did "live up to its responsibility to take appropriate action", but did not *always* do so. . . This "confession" of the UUMA Board's "sins of omission" is MUCH closer to the Truth, but it does not negate the previous *minimization* of clergy sexual misconduct, and the UUMA's decades worth if negligently mishandling of clergy sexual misconduct committed by its members, in this ostensible "apology". Au contraire, it underlines it.
:Our systematic failure has been brought about by misplaced values:
That's one way of putting it, and another self-serving minimization, or at least rationalization, of the UUMA's past negligence towards, and effective complicity in, clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUA clergy. . .
:We have valued the personhood of colleagues in ministry above the personhood of victims-survivors of sexual misconduct.
Yes, the UUMA, the UUA, the UUA's aptly named Ministerial *Fellowship* Committee, and numerous UUA congregations most certainly have valued the personhood of unethical and abusive UUA ministers above the personhood of victims-survivors of sexual misconduct, to say nothing of the personhood of victims-survivors of non-sexual forms of clergy misconduct which the UUA and UUMA have yet to gather up the honesty and integrity required to officially acknowledge, and properly and publicly apologize for.
:We have valued a complacent peace above a just conflict.
Really?! Does the UUMA Board of Trustees genuinely believe that "a collective and systematic failure on the part of generations of UUMA leaders to take appropriate action arising from such misconduct" actually brought "a complacent peace" to the hundreds of UUA congregations that were, and still are. . . seriously harmed not only by clergy sexual misconduct itself, but by decades worth of negligent and complicit mishandling of clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUA ministers? Many UUA congregations are still quite dysfunctional, or otherwise seriously harmed and damaged, by the "fallout" of clergy sexual misconduct that occurred decades ago, to say nothing of much more recent clergy sexual misconduct that has yet to be responsibly dealt with by the UUA and its ever so aptly named Ministerial *Fellowship* Committee. Most ironically, this UUMA letter of apology for clergy sexual misconduct was almost certainly emailed to a number of current UUMA members who have been credibly accused of clergy sexual misconduct in the not so distant past, but have yet to face adequate accountability for their sexual misconduct.
:We have valued the health and stability of the institutions we serve above the health and stability of people who have been sexually abused.
Again, does the UUMA Board of Trustees genuinely believe that "a collective and systematic failure on the part of generations of UUMA leaders to take appropriate action arising from such misconduct" actually contributed to "the health and stability" of the institutions the UUMA serves, i.e. the literally hundreds of UUA congregations that were, and still are. . . negatively affected by UU clergy sexual misconduct?
Most ironically, it would appear that the UUMA still values the health and stability of the institutions UUA clergy serve, or at least the health and stability of its own members, well above the health and stability of people who have been sexually abused by UUMA members, or indeed abused by UUA clergy who are not UUMA members. . . in that the UUMA "identified resources and arranged spaces for care and support" for |UUMA members, set up a "Care and Support Zoom call" scheduled for Friday, June 7, and arranged "a Care and Support gathering" facilitated by Rev. Hope Johnson, and Rev. Kate Walker, "for members who feel pain activated by the UUMA Sexual Misconduct Apology Letter for UUMA" during Ministry Days 2019, as well as "chaplain care for those attending Ministry Days on and off site".
See: https://www.uuma.org/mpage/2019NewsJune7
And: https://www.uuma.org/events/EventDetails.aspx?id=1238523
Dare I ask what similar "care and support" the UUMA and-or UUA have provided for "the health and stability" of those numerous people who have been actually sexually abused, or indeed non-sexually abused. . . by UUMA members?
I await with bated breath to hear the UUMA Board of Trustees' answer to the above question, to say nothing of its answers to the other questions that I have asked in my free and responsible search for the truth and meaning, or dearth thereof. . . of the UUMA Board of Trustee's "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct".
:As clergy, we are regularly moved to preach about atonement. We recognize that atonement is not embodied in or completed by an apology alone. An apology acknowledges that harm has been done, while atonement requires willingness to take responsibility for our role in the harm.
This "letter of apology" clearly minimizes, and even selectively ignores. . . the harm that has been done, not only to the direct victims of clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUA ministers, but also their families, and the affected UUA congregations that the UUMA serves. This seriously flawed institutional apology is what I call "a sorry excuse for an apology". I look forward to the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association issuing a new, and significantly improved, institutional apology for clergy misconduct that will be delivered during the 2020 General Assembly of the Unitarian Universalist Association in June. I see little evidence of the UUMA having any genuine willingness to accept responsibility for its role in the significant harm that has been done not only to the actual victims of clergy sexual misconduct, but also the affected UUA congregations and the Unitarian Universalist "religion" as a whole, in this ostensible "letter of apology for sexual misconduct", and plenty of subtle hints that the UUMA will do little or nothing to try to practice genuine "justice, equity, and compassion in human relations" for the victims-survivors of "historic" (or indeed rather more recent...) clergy sexual misconduct aka clergy sex abuse committed by its members, to say nothing of abusive Unitarian Universalist ministers who are not card-carrying members of the UUMA.
:We are sorry for our past inaction, and are committed to continue working for a transformation of the culture and values that allowed sexual misconduct to go unchecked.
I would certainly encourage the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association to "continue working for a transformation of the culture and values that allowed sexual misconduct to go unchecked", and I do see some evidence of the UUMA making an effort to do so in the proposed revisions to the UUMA Guidelines etc., but this problematic "letter of apology for sexual misconduct" is seriously flawed, not only in terms of its "less than honest" content which minimizes the extent and seriousness of clergy sexual misconduct, and even completely ignores the worst forms of clergy sex abuse, but also in terms of how this "apology" has been delivered, or indeed not delivered. . . to actual victims-survivors of clergy sexual misconduct.
:Though the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association and its members have taken steps in every decade of our institution's existence to recognize, challenge, and punish sexual misconduct through policies and procedures, we acknowledge that the damage done to our faith and our collective ministry requires further healing.
More "less than honest" self-serving rationalization and lame "excuses". . . Any "steps" that the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association and its members took in every decade of the UUMA's existence to recognize, challenge, and punish sexual misconduct through policies and procedures were minimal and inadequate "baby steps", and those "baby steps" were FAR outnumbered by knowing and willful steps taken by the UUMA and UUA to minimize UUism's clergy sexual misconduct problem, protect abusive UUMA members from accountability, and ignore, if not outright reject, literally hundreds of legitimate complaints about clergy sexual misconduct. A minimum of 400 UUA congregations have been affected by clergy sexual misconduct of one kind or another but, to my knowledge, only a few dozen UUA ministers have ever faced any accountability for their clergy sexual misconduct, and often that accountability has been quite minimal and effectively meaningless. Need I point out to you that "a few dozen" UUA ministers found guilty of clergy sexual misconduct, which may only be 2 -3 dozen cases spread over several decades, is still rather more than just "a few" UUMA members who are guilty of clergy sexual misconduct?
The fact of the matter is that the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association, and its members, (to say nothing of non-UUMA UUA clergy) have taken steps in every decade of the UUMA's existence to minimize and even attempt to conceal clergy sexual misconduct, to challenge clergy sexual misconduct complainants and whistleblowers with combative responses to their legitimate complaints and grievances, and even to punish some of those people who dared to expose and denounce Unitarian Universalist clergy misconduct via the abusive misuse of UUMA and UUA policies and procedures, to say nothing of abusive misuse of the police and criminal justice system. When will the UUMA Board of Trustees acknowledge *that* damage done to the Unitarian Universalist faith, which includes, but is by no means limited to. . . the shameful abusive misuse of Canada's blasphemy law, in UUA child sex abuse cover-up legal bullying, that the Rev. Dr. Peter "Beyond Belief" Morales led UUA administration engaged in, in June of 2012?
The clergy misconduct policies and procedures of the UUMA, UUA, and MFC were and still are seriously flawed and quite inadequate, and these policies and procedures were often disregarded and went completely unenforced in any case. I pointed out serious flaws in the policies and procedures of the UUMA and MFC almost a decade ago during the April 2010 meeting of the UUA Board of Trustees. My legitimate criticism, and constructive recommendations for reform, were willfully ignored, and the serious flaws in UUMA and MFC policies and procedures that I identified during that UUA Board meeting still exist, not the least of these flaws being the complete absence of policies and procedures that would allow clergy misconduct complainants the ability to appeal unjust or inadequate rulings made by the UUA or MFC. I will add that I was only able to point out a few particularly problematic flaws in UUMA and MFC policies and procedures during that meeting, there were other serious flaws that I was unable to address, and there was zero follow-up from the UUA Board, even though UUA Moderator Gini Courter assured me that there would be responsible follow-up communications with me.
:We must continue to expand awareness of sexual misconduct and the suffering it creates.
Good.
How about expanding awareness of Unitarian Universalist clergy sexual misconduct, and the suffering it creates, by publicly acknowledging that a certain number of UUA ministers are guilty of what the UUA's Canadian attorney describes as "such despicable crimes as pedophilia and rape"?
How about expanding awareness of sexual misconduct and the suffering it creates, not only for the victims-survivors, but also for their friends and families and the affected congregations, by being fully transparent about ALL of the sexual misconduct that the UUA and UUMA minimized and ignored for decades, and apparently seek to continue to minimize and ignore, if not officially deny?
How about expanding awareness of sexual misconduct and the suffering it creates, by republishing the numerous web pages that the UUA has "memory holed" over the last several years, including the original UUA apology for clergy sexual misconduct that UUA Executive *Vice* President Kathleen "Kay" Montgomery delivered during the 2000 UUA GA, less than two months after I protested against Unitarian Universalist clergy abuse outside 25 Beacon Street in May 2000?
How about expanding awareness of Unitarian Universalist clergy sexual misconduct, and the suffering it creates, by doing what is necessary to ensure that the 2011 and 2016 Berry Street Lectures delivered by Rev. Deborah Pope-Lance and Rev. Gail Seavey are republished on the UUMA website?
How about expanding awareness of Unitarian Universalist clergy sexual misconduct, and the suffering it creates, by taking steps to allow ALL of the people who were cajoled or coerced into signing confidentiality agreements aka NON-disclosure agreements aka NDAs to speak freely and openly about not only the clergy sexual misconduct itself, but how their complaints were negligently, and sometimes even punitively, mishandled by the UUA and-or the implicated UUA congregations?
:We are committed to taking the steps necessary to move this important work forward, and to the vision of restored health through accountability.
It will be interesting to see just how committed the UUMA is in the coming weeks, months, and years. . . I take note of the fact that it is now more than two weeks since I sent my initial "electronic communications" to most if not all of the members of the UUMA Board of Trustees, as well as some UUMA staff, on Thanksgiving Day 2019, but I have yet to receive so much as an official acknowledgement of receipt of my communications with the exception of the few automated responses.
:To those who have been harmed by the actions or inactions of current or past members of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association, we deeply and honestly apologize for the failures of our institution and commit ourselves to building a UUMA in which you will have faith that we will not repeat the sins of our past.
Are "those who have been harmed by the actions or inactions of current or past members of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association" even aware of this UUMA letter of apology for clergy sexual misconduct? It was emailed to your "UUMA Colleagues", but there is little evidence that any of the hundreds if not thousands of victims-survivors of Unitarian Universalist clergy sexual misconduct were ever made aware of this ostensible institutional apology. This is probably just as well in my opinion, because I expect that many victims-survivors of clergy sexual misconduct would not accept this seriously flawed institutional apology that clearly minimizes Unitarian Universalism's clergy misconduct problem, and even completely ignores the most serious forms of UU clergy sex abuse. i.e. "such despicable crimes as pedophilia and rape".
Regrettably, the rather shallow depth, and demonstrable lapses of honesty, in the actual content of the UUMA Board's ostensible "apology letter for sexual misconduct" gives me reasonable grounds to call into question your claim that you "deeply and honestly apologize for the failures of our institution". How can I, or any other reasonably intelligent person, have any well-founded faith that you "will not repeat the sins of our past", when you repeat your "sins of omission" of minimization, and apparently quite willful ignorance, of clergy sexual misconduct committed by "less than perfect" Unitarian Universalist ministers, including convicted pedophiles and rapists. . . in your "apology letter" itself?
:If you would like to speak to someone about this letter, learn how to file a complaint against a minister or find support resources, please visit www.uuma.org/misconduct.
So who actually saw this "letter of apology"? I only became aware of it because one single UUA congregation saw fit to post a screenshot of it to its website, and a Google search for - Unitarian clergy misconduct - that I ran on All Souls Day November 2nd 2019 found it on the 2nd page of search results, almost five months after this letter was sent out to UUMA members in early June of 2019. It seems that, prior to my making this "letter of apology" considerably more public than it was by blogging about it last month, very few people other than UUMA members were even aware that it had been written.
On the surface, and even below the surface. . . (i.e. reading between the lines a bit) it appears that the UUMA Board is apologizing to its own members, i.e. Unitarian Universalist ministers (some of whom are almost certainly guilty of clergy sexual misconduct of one kind or another. . .), rather than apologizing to the actual victims-survivors of clergy sexual misconduct. Sadly, the UUMA Board of Trustees' "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct" looks rather more like a poorly conceived, and quite inept, exercise in "Risk Management" and "Damage Control". Damage control that appears to have been primarily intended to assuage the consciences, and smooth the ruffled feathers, of your numerous "UUMA Colleagues" who have to live with the damaging "legacy" of the UUMA's, and UUA's, decades worth of negligent mishandling of clergy sexual misconduct committed by Unitarian Universalist ministers. Your "apology letter" does not appear to be a sincere and genuine, or indeed comprehensive and adequate. . . official apology meant for the numerous people who have been directly harmed by clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUMA members, or by the negligent and complicit manner in which the UUMA and UUA responded to clergy sexual misconduct for decades.
I made it very clear that I would like to speak to someone about the UUMA Board's "Apology Letter" over two weeks ago on Thanksgiving Day 2019 but, with the exception of some automated "out of office" reply emails, I have yet to hear from one single member of the UUMA Board of Trustees. When will one or more representative(s) of the Board of Trustees of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association deign to honour and uphold Unitarian Universalism's Seven Principles, to say nothing of pertinent clauses of the UUMA Guidelines. . . by responding in responsibility to the letter and the spirit of the "electronic communications" that I have sent to you?
Sincerely,
Robin Edgar
UUMA Board of Trustees
24 Farnsworth Street
Boston, MA
02210-1409 U.S.A.
Friday The 13th December 2019
Dear Members of the Board of Trustees of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association,
When I sent you my "electronic communication" about the serious flaws in the UUMA Board's ostensible apology for clergy sexual misconduct just over two weeks ago on Thanksgiving Day 2019, I expected to receive a timely response to it from the UUMA based upon the fact that the UUMA website's form submission stated that the "electronic communication" that I submitted via the online form on the UUMA's website would be responded to in a timely manner. I did not expect a response until a week or more after submitting my "electronic communication" and sending you back-up emails of the same communication, because of the Thanksgiving holiday and ensuing weekend, but it has now been more than two weeks since I shared my concerns with you and I have not received any response to my sharing of my concerns other than the automated response from your website and a couple of automated "out of office" reply emails to the back-up emails that I sent you and some UUMA staff. If I do not receive a response from the UUMA Board by the end of next week I will reasonably assume that the UUMA Board is knowingly and willfully refusing to respond in responsibility to my sharing of my legitimate, and quite serious, concerns about your problematic "letter of apology" for the UUMA's decades worth of negligence towards clergy sexual misconduct, to say nothing of UUMA negligence towards non-sexual forms of clergy misconduct.
Please take steps to ensure that the UUMA Board responds in responsibility to both the letter and the spirit of my "electronic communications" of November 28th, 2019, as well as today's follow-up communication, by the end of next week at the latest. It would be quite regrettable if the UUMA Board chose to start off the next decade on the wrong foot with respect to the UUMA's past, and apparently ongoing. . . involvement in Unitarian Universalist clergy abuse cover-up and denial which includes, but is by no means limited to, what Dee Ann Miller calls DIM Thinking.
i.e. Denial, Ignorance, and Minimization
See: www.takecourage.org/defining.htm
I did say that I would expand upon the critique of your problematic ostensible "apology" for clergy sexual misconduct, so I am hereby providing you with my updated point-by-point critique of the UUMA Board's seriously flawed "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct":
:Dear UUMA Colleagues,
This introductory salutation makes it clear that the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association's self-described "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct" was sent to "UUMA colleagues". i.e. Unitarian Universalist ministers who are members of the UUMA. Surely an ostensible "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct" should first and foremost be addressed to, and delivered to, the actual victims and survivors of clergy sexual misconduct, followed by their friends and families, and then the UUA congregations that have been negatively affected by recent or "historic" clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUA clergy.
Why was the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association's "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct" sent only to members of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association, and apparently kept hidden from not only the general public, but from the vast majority of Unitarian Universalists?
Why is the "Letter of Apology" concealed behind a "firewall" on the UUMA website?
Were the UUMA members who this "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct" was sent to instructed, of otherwise expected, deliver this ostensible "apology letter" to the congregants of their respective Unitarian Universalist congregations during a Sunday service, or otherwise communicate it to their congregants?
:We, the Board of Trustees of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association, wish to offer an apology on behalf of the institution, for the harm we have done by failing to take appropriate action arising from sexual misconduct committed by our members.
Again, who is this institutional apology actually meant for? It seems that it was sent only to Unitarian Universalist ministers who are members of the UUMA. This is not even all Unitarian Universalost ministers, since some UUA ministers are not members of the UUMA. It also seems to apologize for sexual misconduct committed by UUMA members, not Unitarian Universalist ministers more generally. Did *any* victims-survivors of clergy sexual misconduct aka clergy sex abuse committed by UUMA members receive copies of this ostensible institutional "letter of apology" for clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUMA members?
:We regret our actions or inactions that have in any way ignored, minimized or not responded appropriately to their misconduct.
This statement of regret is more than a little bit ironic in that this UUMA "letter of apology" itself significantly minimizes the extent and seriousness of clergy sexual misconduct committed by Unitarian Universalist clergy (or at least UUMA members); indeed this "apology letter" even completely ignores some of the worst forms of clergy sexual misconduct (i.e. "such despicable crimes as pedophilia and rape") in that it makes no mention whatsoever of these despicable crimes which have in fact been committed by certain Unitarian Universalist ministers. . . It would be fair to say that this UUMA institutional "apology" does not respond appropriately to the past, indeed "historic", sexual misconduct of UUA ministers.
:While the great majority of our colleagues have conducted themselves with the utmost honesty and integrity, a few have not, and our institution did not always live up to its responsibility to take appropriate action.
Really?!
Only "a few" UUMA members have not "conducted themselves with the utmost honesty and integrity"?!
Coulda fooled me. . .
I know of dozens, if not hundreds, of Unitarian Universalist ministers who have most certainly not conducted themselves with "the utmost honesty and integrity", indeed this UUMA "letter of apology" does not model "the utmost honesty and integrity" in that it clearly minimizes the extent and seriousness of clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUMA members, and even completely ignores the worst forms of clergy sexual abuse, i.e. "such despicable crimes as pedophilia and rape" most certainly committed by "certain Unitarian Universalist ministers". As far as I am concerned, it is bordering on self-congratulatory narcissism for the UUMA Board of Trustees to assert that "the great majority of our colleagues have conducted themselves with the utmost honesty and integrity". I am not aware of one single Unitarian Universalist minister who has conducted themself with "the utmost honesty and integrity" throughout their career as a UUA minister.
Not one. . .
Getting back to that use of the word "few" to refer to those UUMA members who have not "conducted themselves with the utmost honesty and integrity". . . Those who are "in the know" about Unitarian Universalist clergy sexual misconduct matters know that literally hundreds of UUA congregations have been affected by clergy sexual misconduct of one kind or another. I am quite reliably informed that a group of interim ministers, who took it upon themselves to count the number of UUA congregations that have had clergy sexual misconduct complaints brought against one or more of their ministers, stopped counting when they reached 400. That is almost 40% of UUA congregations, and that incomplete calculation was done some years ago now. How could only "a few" members of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers Association, to say nothing of UUA clergy more generally, cause a minimum of 400 UUA congregations to be affected by clergy sexual misconduct?
And 400 UUA congregations is the *minimum* number of UU congregations affected by clergy sexual misconduct of one kind or another. Other people who are very well informed about Unitarian Universalism's clergy sexual misconduct problem have estimated that 600-700 of the UUA's 1000 or so congregations have been affected by clergy sexual misconduct. It is "beyond belief" that only "a few" UUMA members could commit clergy sexual misconduct in 400 or more UUA congregations.
UUA Moderator Jim Key told the very same lie in the "less than honest" institutional apology that he delivered on behalf of the UUA Board of Trustees during his first Moderator's Report to a General Assembly of the Unitarian Universalist Association in June of 2014. You may read my point-by-point critique of the UUA Board's seriously flawed and, in my opinion, completely worthless institutional apology for clergy sexual misconduct here:
http://emersonavenger.blogspot.com/2015/12/uua-moderator-jim-key-liar-liar-pants.html
Regarding the UUMA Board's rather questionable use of the phrase "the utmost honesty and integrity". . . Is it even remotely appropriate for the UUMA Board to assert that "a few" UUMA members have not "conducted themselves with the utmost honesty and integrity" when describing UUMA members who have committed clergy sexual misconduct, some of which includes what the UUA's Canadian attorney, Stikeman Elliott Barristers & Solicitors defamation lawyer Maitre Marc-André Coulombe, has described as "such despicable crimes as pedophilia and rape"?
The UUMA's assertion that "our institution did not always live up to its responsibility to take appropriate action" is yet another UUMA *minimization* of the negligent and complicit manner in which the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association, the Unitarian Universalist Association aka UUA, and the UUA's very aptly named Ministerial *Fellowship* Committee responded to complaints about clergy sexual misconduct, to say nothing of complaints about non-sexual misconduct committed by UUA clergy, for decades. Asserting that "our institution did not always live up to its responsibility to take appropriate action" suggests that there were only a few lapses here and there but that, on the whole, the UUMA generally did "live up to its responsibility to take appropriate action".
Nothing could be further from the truth.
:We offer this apology because we recognize that there has been a collective and systematic failure on the part of generations of UUMA leaders to take appropriate action arising from such misconduct.
Most ironically, this acknowledgement actually contradicts the UUMA Board's assertions in the previous paragraph to the effect that only "a few" UUMA members are guilty of committing clergy sexual misconduct of one kind or another, and the "less than honest" misleading insinuation that the UUMA generally did "live up to its responsibility to take appropriate action", but did not *always* do so. . . This "confession" of the UUMA Board's "sins of omission" is MUCH closer to the Truth, but it does not negate the previous *minimization* of clergy sexual misconduct, and the UUMA's decades worth if negligently mishandling of clergy sexual misconduct committed by its members, in this ostensible "apology". Au contraire, it underlines it.
:Our systematic failure has been brought about by misplaced values:
That's one way of putting it, and another self-serving minimization, or at least rationalization, of the UUMA's past negligence towards, and effective complicity in, clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUA clergy. . .
:We have valued the personhood of colleagues in ministry above the personhood of victims-survivors of sexual misconduct.
Yes, the UUMA, the UUA, the UUA's aptly named Ministerial *Fellowship* Committee, and numerous UUA congregations most certainly have valued the personhood of unethical and abusive UUA ministers above the personhood of victims-survivors of sexual misconduct, to say nothing of the personhood of victims-survivors of non-sexual forms of clergy misconduct which the UUA and UUMA have yet to gather up the honesty and integrity required to officially acknowledge, and properly and publicly apologize for.
:We have valued a complacent peace above a just conflict.
Really?! Does the UUMA Board of Trustees genuinely believe that "a collective and systematic failure on the part of generations of UUMA leaders to take appropriate action arising from such misconduct" actually brought "a complacent peace" to the hundreds of UUA congregations that were, and still are. . . seriously harmed not only by clergy sexual misconduct itself, but by decades worth of negligent and complicit mishandling of clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUA ministers? Many UUA congregations are still quite dysfunctional, or otherwise seriously harmed and damaged, by the "fallout" of clergy sexual misconduct that occurred decades ago, to say nothing of much more recent clergy sexual misconduct that has yet to be responsibly dealt with by the UUA and its ever so aptly named Ministerial *Fellowship* Committee. Most ironically, this UUMA letter of apology for clergy sexual misconduct was almost certainly emailed to a number of current UUMA members who have been credibly accused of clergy sexual misconduct in the not so distant past, but have yet to face adequate accountability for their sexual misconduct.
:We have valued the health and stability of the institutions we serve above the health and stability of people who have been sexually abused.
Again, does the UUMA Board of Trustees genuinely believe that "a collective and systematic failure on the part of generations of UUMA leaders to take appropriate action arising from such misconduct" actually contributed to "the health and stability" of the institutions the UUMA serves, i.e. the literally hundreds of UUA congregations that were, and still are. . . negatively affected by UU clergy sexual misconduct?
Most ironically, it would appear that the UUMA still values the health and stability of the institutions UUA clergy serve, or at least the health and stability of its own members, well above the health and stability of people who have been sexually abused by UUMA members, or indeed abused by UUA clergy who are not UUMA members. . . in that the UUMA "identified resources and arranged spaces for care and support" for |UUMA members, set up a "Care and Support Zoom call" scheduled for Friday, June 7, and arranged "a Care and Support gathering" facilitated by Rev. Hope Johnson, and Rev. Kate Walker, "for members who feel pain activated by the UUMA Sexual Misconduct Apology Letter for UUMA" during Ministry Days 2019, as well as "chaplain care for those attending Ministry Days on and off site".
See: https://www.uuma.org/mpage/2019NewsJune7
And: https://www.uuma.org/events/EventDetails.aspx?id=1238523
Dare I ask what similar "care and support" the UUMA and-or UUA have provided for "the health and stability" of those numerous people who have been actually sexually abused, or indeed non-sexually abused. . . by UUMA members?
I await with bated breath to hear the UUMA Board of Trustees' answer to the above question, to say nothing of its answers to the other questions that I have asked in my free and responsible search for the truth and meaning, or dearth thereof. . . of the UUMA Board of Trustee's "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct".
:As clergy, we are regularly moved to preach about atonement. We recognize that atonement is not embodied in or completed by an apology alone. An apology acknowledges that harm has been done, while atonement requires willingness to take responsibility for our role in the harm.
This "letter of apology" clearly minimizes, and even selectively ignores. . . the harm that has been done, not only to the direct victims of clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUA ministers, but also their families, and the affected UUA congregations that the UUMA serves. This seriously flawed institutional apology is what I call "a sorry excuse for an apology". I look forward to the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association issuing a new, and significantly improved, institutional apology for clergy misconduct that will be delivered during the 2020 General Assembly of the Unitarian Universalist Association in June. I see little evidence of the UUMA having any genuine willingness to accept responsibility for its role in the significant harm that has been done not only to the actual victims of clergy sexual misconduct, but also the affected UUA congregations and the Unitarian Universalist "religion" as a whole, in this ostensible "letter of apology for sexual misconduct", and plenty of subtle hints that the UUMA will do little or nothing to try to practice genuine "justice, equity, and compassion in human relations" for the victims-survivors of "historic" (or indeed rather more recent...) clergy sexual misconduct aka clergy sex abuse committed by its members, to say nothing of abusive Unitarian Universalist ministers who are not card-carrying members of the UUMA.
:We are sorry for our past inaction, and are committed to continue working for a transformation of the culture and values that allowed sexual misconduct to go unchecked.
I would certainly encourage the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association to "continue working for a transformation of the culture and values that allowed sexual misconduct to go unchecked", and I do see some evidence of the UUMA making an effort to do so in the proposed revisions to the UUMA Guidelines etc., but this problematic "letter of apology for sexual misconduct" is seriously flawed, not only in terms of its "less than honest" content which minimizes the extent and seriousness of clergy sexual misconduct, and even completely ignores the worst forms of clergy sex abuse, but also in terms of how this "apology" has been delivered, or indeed not delivered. . . to actual victims-survivors of clergy sexual misconduct.
:Though the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association and its members have taken steps in every decade of our institution's existence to recognize, challenge, and punish sexual misconduct through policies and procedures, we acknowledge that the damage done to our faith and our collective ministry requires further healing.
More "less than honest" self-serving rationalization and lame "excuses". . . Any "steps" that the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association and its members took in every decade of the UUMA's existence to recognize, challenge, and punish sexual misconduct through policies and procedures were minimal and inadequate "baby steps", and those "baby steps" were FAR outnumbered by knowing and willful steps taken by the UUMA and UUA to minimize UUism's clergy sexual misconduct problem, protect abusive UUMA members from accountability, and ignore, if not outright reject, literally hundreds of legitimate complaints about clergy sexual misconduct. A minimum of 400 UUA congregations have been affected by clergy sexual misconduct of one kind or another but, to my knowledge, only a few dozen UUA ministers have ever faced any accountability for their clergy sexual misconduct, and often that accountability has been quite minimal and effectively meaningless. Need I point out to you that "a few dozen" UUA ministers found guilty of clergy sexual misconduct, which may only be 2 -3 dozen cases spread over several decades, is still rather more than just "a few" UUMA members who are guilty of clergy sexual misconduct?
The fact of the matter is that the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association, and its members, (to say nothing of non-UUMA UUA clergy) have taken steps in every decade of the UUMA's existence to minimize and even attempt to conceal clergy sexual misconduct, to challenge clergy sexual misconduct complainants and whistleblowers with combative responses to their legitimate complaints and grievances, and even to punish some of those people who dared to expose and denounce Unitarian Universalist clergy misconduct via the abusive misuse of UUMA and UUA policies and procedures, to say nothing of abusive misuse of the police and criminal justice system. When will the UUMA Board of Trustees acknowledge *that* damage done to the Unitarian Universalist faith, which includes, but is by no means limited to. . . the shameful abusive misuse of Canada's blasphemy law, in UUA child sex abuse cover-up legal bullying, that the Rev. Dr. Peter "Beyond Belief" Morales led UUA administration engaged in, in June of 2012?
The clergy misconduct policies and procedures of the UUMA, UUA, and MFC were and still are seriously flawed and quite inadequate, and these policies and procedures were often disregarded and went completely unenforced in any case. I pointed out serious flaws in the policies and procedures of the UUMA and MFC almost a decade ago during the April 2010 meeting of the UUA Board of Trustees. My legitimate criticism, and constructive recommendations for reform, were willfully ignored, and the serious flaws in UUMA and MFC policies and procedures that I identified during that UUA Board meeting still exist, not the least of these flaws being the complete absence of policies and procedures that would allow clergy misconduct complainants the ability to appeal unjust or inadequate rulings made by the UUA or MFC. I will add that I was only able to point out a few particularly problematic flaws in UUMA and MFC policies and procedures during that meeting, there were other serious flaws that I was unable to address, and there was zero follow-up from the UUA Board, even though UUA Moderator Gini Courter assured me that there would be responsible follow-up communications with me.
:We must continue to expand awareness of sexual misconduct and the suffering it creates.
Good.
How about expanding awareness of Unitarian Universalist clergy sexual misconduct, and the suffering it creates, by publicly acknowledging that a certain number of UUA ministers are guilty of what the UUA's Canadian attorney describes as "such despicable crimes as pedophilia and rape"?
How about expanding awareness of sexual misconduct and the suffering it creates, not only for the victims-survivors, but also for their friends and families and the affected congregations, by being fully transparent about ALL of the sexual misconduct that the UUA and UUMA minimized and ignored for decades, and apparently seek to continue to minimize and ignore, if not officially deny?
How about expanding awareness of sexual misconduct and the suffering it creates, by republishing the numerous web pages that the UUA has "memory holed" over the last several years, including the original UUA apology for clergy sexual misconduct that UUA Executive *Vice* President Kathleen "Kay" Montgomery delivered during the 2000 UUA GA, less than two months after I protested against Unitarian Universalist clergy abuse outside 25 Beacon Street in May 2000?
How about expanding awareness of Unitarian Universalist clergy sexual misconduct, and the suffering it creates, by doing what is necessary to ensure that the 2011 and 2016 Berry Street Lectures delivered by Rev. Deborah Pope-Lance and Rev. Gail Seavey are republished on the UUMA website?
How about expanding awareness of Unitarian Universalist clergy sexual misconduct, and the suffering it creates, by taking steps to allow ALL of the people who were cajoled or coerced into signing confidentiality agreements aka NON-disclosure agreements aka NDAs to speak freely and openly about not only the clergy sexual misconduct itself, but how their complaints were negligently, and sometimes even punitively, mishandled by the UUA and-or the implicated UUA congregations?
:We are committed to taking the steps necessary to move this important work forward, and to the vision of restored health through accountability.
It will be interesting to see just how committed the UUMA is in the coming weeks, months, and years. . . I take note of the fact that it is now more than two weeks since I sent my initial "electronic communications" to most if not all of the members of the UUMA Board of Trustees, as well as some UUMA staff, on Thanksgiving Day 2019, but I have yet to receive so much as an official acknowledgement of receipt of my communications with the exception of the few automated responses.
:To those who have been harmed by the actions or inactions of current or past members of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association, we deeply and honestly apologize for the failures of our institution and commit ourselves to building a UUMA in which you will have faith that we will not repeat the sins of our past.
Are "those who have been harmed by the actions or inactions of current or past members of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association" even aware of this UUMA letter of apology for clergy sexual misconduct? It was emailed to your "UUMA Colleagues", but there is little evidence that any of the hundreds if not thousands of victims-survivors of Unitarian Universalist clergy sexual misconduct were ever made aware of this ostensible institutional apology. This is probably just as well in my opinion, because I expect that many victims-survivors of clergy sexual misconduct would not accept this seriously flawed institutional apology that clearly minimizes Unitarian Universalism's clergy misconduct problem, and even completely ignores the most serious forms of UU clergy sex abuse. i.e. "such despicable crimes as pedophilia and rape".
Regrettably, the rather shallow depth, and demonstrable lapses of honesty, in the actual content of the UUMA Board's ostensible "apology letter for sexual misconduct" gives me reasonable grounds to call into question your claim that you "deeply and honestly apologize for the failures of our institution". How can I, or any other reasonably intelligent person, have any well-founded faith that you "will not repeat the sins of our past", when you repeat your "sins of omission" of minimization, and apparently quite willful ignorance, of clergy sexual misconduct committed by "less than perfect" Unitarian Universalist ministers, including convicted pedophiles and rapists. . . in your "apology letter" itself?
:If you would like to speak to someone about this letter, learn how to file a complaint against a minister or find support resources, please visit www.uuma.org/misconduct.
So who actually saw this "letter of apology"? I only became aware of it because one single UUA congregation saw fit to post a screenshot of it to its website, and a Google search for - Unitarian clergy misconduct - that I ran on All Souls Day November 2nd 2019 found it on the 2nd page of search results, almost five months after this letter was sent out to UUMA members in early June of 2019. It seems that, prior to my making this "letter of apology" considerably more public than it was by blogging about it last month, very few people other than UUMA members were even aware that it had been written.
On the surface, and even below the surface. . . (i.e. reading between the lines a bit) it appears that the UUMA Board is apologizing to its own members, i.e. Unitarian Universalist ministers (some of whom are almost certainly guilty of clergy sexual misconduct of one kind or another. . .), rather than apologizing to the actual victims-survivors of clergy sexual misconduct. Sadly, the UUMA Board of Trustees' "Apology Letter for Sexual Misconduct" looks rather more like a poorly conceived, and quite inept, exercise in "Risk Management" and "Damage Control". Damage control that appears to have been primarily intended to assuage the consciences, and smooth the ruffled feathers, of your numerous "UUMA Colleagues" who have to live with the damaging "legacy" of the UUMA's, and UUA's, decades worth of negligent mishandling of clergy sexual misconduct committed by Unitarian Universalist ministers. Your "apology letter" does not appear to be a sincere and genuine, or indeed comprehensive and adequate. . . official apology meant for the numerous people who have been directly harmed by clergy sexual misconduct committed by UUMA members, or by the negligent and complicit manner in which the UUMA and UUA responded to clergy sexual misconduct for decades.
I made it very clear that I would like to speak to someone about the UUMA Board's "Apology Letter" over two weeks ago on Thanksgiving Day 2019 but, with the exception of some automated "out of office" reply emails, I have yet to hear from one single member of the UUMA Board of Trustees. When will one or more representative(s) of the Board of Trustees of the Unitarian Universalist Ministers' Association deign to honour and uphold Unitarian Universalism's Seven Principles, to say nothing of pertinent clauses of the UUMA Guidelines. . . by responding in responsibility to the letter and the spirit of the "electronic communications" that I have sent to you?
Sincerely,
Robin Edgar
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